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Moving with a Toddler | Tips, Tricks, and My Experience
Expat Life

Moving with a Toddler | Tips, Tricks, and My Experience

January 20, 2021

Moving is a lot of hard work. Moving around the world adds a layer of stress/work. Moving around the world with a toddler in tow can seem impossible. But I’m here to tell you that it is possible and you can do it! We just moved from Los Angeles to Oxford, England with our two-year-old daughter and while it was difficult at times, it was definitely doable and even enjoyable.

This post has our experience in detail along with all of my tips for moving with a toddler.

Talk About Moving

My first tip for moving with a toddler is to talk with them about it. Be very open and honest with them about when you are moving, where you are moving to, and fun things that they will experience in the new place and along the way.

Talking with your children in general is a good practice to cultivate. There are many things that you can talk about and you should talk about with your child. I have found that it is helpful for the child to talk with you and it helps you learn more about them as you talk with them. In our house, we talk with our daughter quite a bit and that made talking about the move seem like just a regular part of our life.

But I do think it was essential for my daughter. I know that talking about moving has helped her transition and given her excitement for this new adventure that she would not have had otherwise.

And, really, talking is a common courtesy to your child. I think it is easy to fall into the habit of not being kind to your kids when we should be. No one wants to just wake up one day and get on a plane not knowing where they’re going and all their toys and everything they knew is gone. That’s simply not nice. So, talking about moving and the aspects thereof with your children is important.

After we had initially told our daughter we were moving to Oxford and the details about when and where, we would often have conversations like this:

Mom: “Hey, Aletheia, where are we going in January?”
A: “To Oxford!” (With both hands jolting up in excitement!)
Mom: “And what will we do to get there?”
A: “Ride on the airplane, take a bus, and see lots of pretty things.”

Even something simple like this still helps their little brains to process and get ready for the big move ahead. She would often ask other questions and I would just answer them as best as I could. Sometimes I didn’t know the answer and I would say that we get to find out together once we move to Oxford.

Remind Them Who Is Always with Them When They Move

Another thing that we’ve talked about with our daughter (even before preparing to move) is that Jesus is always with her. I’ve shared Hebrews 13:5 with her multiple times. In it, God says that He will “never leave us nor forsake us.” I’ve told her that means Jesus is with us all the time.

When your room is dark and its time to go to sleep, Jesus is with you. When you hear a loud noise and it makes you jump, Jesus is with you. When you are flying on a plane to new place, Jesus is with you.

These conversations were also part of our normal day before our move. Instilling Scripture like this in your kids is a great way to encourage them to trust in the Lord when they are scared or unsure.

I know that there were times Aletheia was unsure about our move and I pray that these conversations helped her to know Jesus will always be with her even when we left our home in CA to come to England.

How to Get Rid of Toys Before Moving

Now, I’ve been telling you to talk about everything with your child… well, there is one thing that I did not totally talk about with our daughter: getting rid of her toys.

Getting rid of toys seemed like the hardest task of this move. I’m sure it would be different for each toddler and where they are developmentally, but I decided that it would be best for my daughter to not talk about getting rid of her toys before our move. I knew that if we talked about it every time we got rid of a toy it would just be an endless cycle of her getting upset, wanting to keep the toy, and then not being able to get rid of it cause she suddenly wants to play with it.

So, instead of totally involving her in this process, I simple started getting rid of a few toys here and there while she was napping or after bedtime. But I kept most of her toys up until the very last days of our move. That way, she still had plenty of toys to play with while us parents were busy packing and preparing. And then there wasn’t a big struggle everyday to help her get rid of her toys.

It also helped to keep her world somewhat normal right up until we left. Our apartment looked emptier and emptier as we got closer to our moving day, but she could still play with all her toys in her room.

In the final days before our move we got rid of the rest of her toys, still without her noticing for the most part. There were some occasions while getting rid of things where she asked me point blank and I, of course, told her the truth, “We can’t keep this toy because it will not fit in our suitcase when we move to Oxford.” And this answer did seem to suffice except for when she saw one of her favorite toys get taken out and a tantrum ensued.

It was an opportunity for me to have grace with her because she was experiencing so much change and excitement and so many new things all at once. But that moment also made me glad that we had decided to not talk with her about all the other toys!

Again, you’ll have to do what you feel is right for your child, but this is what worked for us.

We also knew that we would have to purchase a few toys here at our new house. I’m glad we wait to do this because we don’t have that much space. But, now that we are here, we did get a few toys (with the help of Aletheia’s grandparents). She’s loving playing with this barn and this doll house from Melissa and Doug. Having the new toys definitely helped her not miss her old toys.

Keep on Talking

Overall, Aletheia has done very well with this move. She was very excited to get on the plane, to see our new house, and she cannot wait to go to the park here. She has asked a few questions about going back to our “California home” as she calls it now, but our answer that this is our new home and we will be staying here now seems to be enough for her. Although, when we first arrived, she was not so sure about going potty in our new house and she said, “I’ll just wait until we go back to our California home.” She got over that pretty quickly!

We are only a little bit into our move, so I am interested to see how she will do in the coming weeks. I’m sure that it will all become more and more normal as we go. And, I’m also sure that we will just keep dialoguing with her about all the changes and different things that come up.

That is the last tip for moving with a toddler: Keep talking to them!

I can’t stress enough how important it is to communicate with your children. Even if you aren’t moving around the world. They need your direction and guidance. So have conversations with them! Sure, they are simple when they are toddlers, but those moments of talking one-to-one with your child will flourish as they grow older. And you will be thankful for having started learning to talk with them early on.

It Is Actually Fun!

It is exciting to have a little world traveler and to think that she has already flown around the world before she turned three! I pray that these experiences will shape and mold her into a young woman who fears the Lord and is fearless because of the assurance of His presence and watch-care over her.

And, it’s been so fun to see her reaction to all the new things. Whether its a new food she’s not sure about or flying on the airplane, seeing the world through a child’s eyes really makes you more grateful for the joy in the details.


Are you moving with a toddler soon? Let me know in the comments!

*This post contains affiliate links, you can read my full disclosure here.

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Downsizing | We Only Kept 10% of Our Stuff!
Two Weeks in Oxford, England! | Personal Updates

Welcome! I’m Deborah. So glad you’re here!

Here you’ll find encouraging, Scripture-filled posts and Bible study tips. Because theology is for every mom! Get to know me here.

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    We are called to know and love the Scriptures that We are called to know and love the Scriptures that God has given us. The most meaningful example of this for me is what David wrote in Psalm 119. That Psalm is 176 verses of praises and benefits of knowing the Scriptures. David loved them! And how can we come to know and love the Scriptures like that without reading them on a regular basis?

And when we look to the New Testament, Jesus constantly quoted Scripture, elevating it to a high place and showing us that we need to know it as well. And then in the epistles we are encouraged to encourage one another with Scripture and Psalms. How can we do all of this if we aren’t reading the Bible every day? So it is clear that we need to be immersed in the Words of Scripture. They are truly the Words of life because they come directly from God and we need them to live each day of our lives here on earth.

To help you read the Bible this summer, I've put together the Psalms of the Summer 2023 Bible Reading plan. 🎉  This plan will take you through the book of Psalms 3 times throughout this summer. Once in June, once in July, and once in August. And there are 3 Psalms selected to memorize along with your Bible reading. I will be following this plan as well.

Why am I reading through Psalms so much this summer? Well, I have actually dedicated the last 3 summers to studying the Psalms exclusively in my quiet times and Bible readings. It has been so encouraging to really dig deeply into this book of the Bible throughout the summertime months. I also realized that when I use the Bible Reading Challenge plan throughout the year, I am only reading a Psalm here or there along with another passage. I believe the book of Psalms should be read in order and studied that way. So when I have the extra time in the summer, I read through the Psalms chapter by chapter… and it’s amazing!

I’d love for you to join me in reading through the Psalms this summer. I will need accountability as I am going to have a newborn this summer! So please click over to my blog at my bio link and download the free Bible reading plan for the Psalms of the Summer. Print it and stick it in your Bible to start reading on June 1st with me, that's Thursday! 💕
    39 weeks and 5 days! 😍 This is actually the lon 39 weeks and 5 days! 😍 This is actually the longest I've been pregnant because my daughter came at 39 weeks. I am so looking forward to having a newborn again. But at the same time, I've done it before and I know how hard it is! 🫠 

One thing that has always helped me when mom life becomes more demanding is reading my Bible daily. So, for this summer, I put together a new Bible Reading plan that I'll be following and it's available on my blog now for you too! Having a plan printed on paper in my Bible is the best option for me, but what about you? How do you stay in your Bible when you have so much going on as a mother? Let me know in the comments! 😀
    "Finding your tribe" is overrated. When I lived ba "Finding your tribe" is overrated.
When I lived back in Los Angeles, I had one mom friend in particular who agreed with me on pretty much everything (I think the sole exception was headcovering). We were often texting each other about what first foods we’d give our babies and what non-toxic baby products we found at cheap prices. It was great! There was a certain ease that came with being friends simply because we agreed and enjoyed a lot of the same things. When I moved here to England, I found that the fastest and easiest way to make new friends was through my church. Both because it was a new place and because we moved when there were still covid restrictions and church was one of the only things we could go to. Now, that means that I have become friends with lots of different people at church who have lots of different viewpoints in parenting and life. 

I’ve learned that being a good mom friend should not always be about finding the moms that will agree with you on everything. It’s about finding the moms who also love Jesus and live for Him and letting that connect you instead. Now, don’t get me wrong, it is a lot of fun to bond over things like sourdough bread, or co-sleeping, or flower-arranging, or being a traditional wife/homemaker.. But how much more impactful is it to bond over things like worshiping Sunday by Sunday together, praying for one another during the week, studying Scripture together at Bible study, and encouraging each other to keep serving the Lord? 

All the trends that we enjoy that bind us together could never bind us together like our bond in Christ. He’s the one who causes us to live together in harmony and builds beautiful friendships among His people. 

So, finding your tribe is overrated. Go out and find your local church and get connected there instead.

Galatians 3:26-28, “For you are all sons and daughters of God through faith in Christ Jesus. For all of you who were baptized into Christ have clothed yourselves with Christ. There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is neither male nor female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus."
    Okay, here’s what I’ve been thinking in regard Okay, here’s what I’ve been thinking in regard to the #tradwife movement as I’ve seen it here on Instagram. 

Comparison is a thief of joy. As with any trend, we see it and want to make it happen in our own life and home. Now, don’t get me wrong, I actually do a lot of the things that would be considered part of the #tradwife trend… cook everything from scratch, wear pretty, floral dresses, take walks with my child, homeschool, etc... I mean, most of my time right now is literally spent pregnant and barefoot in the kitchen! While all of those things are good and there’s no problem with doing them, they are not the end-all be-all of being a good mother or homemaker. We must look back to the Scripture for definitions of both womanhood and motherhood (and even homemaker-hood from Proverbs 31!). Remember that 1 Peter 3 lays out our role as wives pretty well and it doesn’t have distinctions like what our kitchens or our outfits should specifically look like (except being modest, of course). It says, “In the same way, you wives, be subject to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won over without a word by the behavior of their wives, as they observe your pure and respectful behavior. Your adornment must not be merely the external–braiding the hair, wearing gold jewelry, or putting on apparel; but it should be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God.”

So, don’t compare your life so much to what you see online that you feel unhappy with what God has given you. You are not any less of a good homemaker or wife because you have a rental kitchen with a pink wall and very modern cabinets instead of open, wood shelving and a collection of brass pots. As long as you are living your life according to the Scriptures, then you are doing what the Lord has called you to do and that should bring you joy.

..........................

What have you thought about this traditional wife movement? I have another post coming after this, so look for it!
    I came to the realization that even if it did happ I came to the realization that even if it did happen again, if I did lose this baby too, God would still be faithful. I have already walked that road with Him two times and I can do it again in His faithfulness. Of course, it would be sad. But I trust God. He knows whether or not I need to hold this baby in my arms or only in my womb. So, instead of letting my heart worry, I purposed to rejoice in His kindness to give me another baby for however long He wills. 

Isaiah 40:11 helps me when I have anxious thoughts. It says, “Like a shepherd He [God] will tend His flock, In His arm He will gather the lambs and carry them in His bosom; He will gently lead the nursing lambs.” God has tender care for us moms, He knows what we deal with in each pregnancy. And that truth tells me that should the worst happen in my life, whatever it may be, God will carry me in His arms, He will be faithful.

I love the Old Testament book of Lamentations. It is a very sad and chaotic book. The Israelites are being afflicted, their enemies are overtaking them, and it seems as if there is no hope. But right in the middle of the whole book, in the chaos, it says in Lamentations 3:21-24, “This I recall to my mind, therefore I have hope. The Lord’s lovingkindnesses indeed never cease, for His compassions never fail, they are new every morning; Great is Your faithfulness. ‘The Lord is my portion,’ says my soul, ‘Therefore I have hope in Him.’”

In the middle of the chaos in our lives, in the times when we just have storm after storm, we can still have hope. God’s lovingkindness is there and He is faithful.

Even if we never have another child after loss or never have children at all, God is faithful. We’re not promised a certain number of kids in Scripture, but we are promised that God is for us and not against us, that Jesus gave His life for us, and so much more. So we can trust God and His faithfulness. I’m so thankful that it’s not dependent on what happens in my life. He will be faithful with or without a “rainbow baby.”

So, I won’t be calling this baby my rainbow baby, but I will be constantly so grateful for this new baby, it is more than anything I could ever deserve. 💕
    The term “rainbow baby” describes babies who a The term “rainbow baby” describes babies who are born after the mother has lost a previous pregnancy or multiple pregnancies. They are supposed to be a symbol of the “beauty that comes after a storm.” 

There is also the more Christian definition from the story of Noah. God sent a rainbow after the worldwide flood as a sign of His promise to never flood the earth again in such a way. And maybe we should read Genesis 6 over more often because I have found this Christian definition rather problematic when we think of it in light of what the Bible says.

When we read the story of Noah in the Bible and when we picture it in our head, we think of Noah and his family in the ark with the animals, the rain coming, and then, once the waters subside, the world being beautiful and happy, lush and green, the perfect place to live. 

Now, I’m sure that the vegetation under the water from the flood was green and growing when Noah and his family came off the ark. But the reality of the situation after the flood is that the earth would’ve been covered in the remains of death. The flood killed everyone and everything that wasn’t on the ark. All those bodies and debris were still somewhere. So, there probably was grass growing, but growing with the signs of destruction and chaos everywhere.

When Noah and his family stepped off the ark, they didn’t immediately give offerings to God in worship because of beauty. They did it because they had been miraculously saved from the destruction that surrounded them. So God gave Noah the sign of the rainbow to show His faithfulness in preserving His people. Noah and his family could continue looking for the seed who would crush the serpent’s head that God promised in Genesis 3:15 because they were alive and not killed in the flood.

So, the flood was not just any other storm and I think it is not wise to compare the hard things in our lives, the storms as we call them, to the flood that totally destroyed the world. The sign of the rainbow in the Bible is much, much more than simply the beauty after a storm. It is God’s covenant faithfulness on display to His people after a horribly needed judgment on the entire planet.
    Going to the hospital for an ultrasound has felt r Going to the hospital for an ultrasound has felt really strange! Back in LA my doctor would do one in her little office to check on the baby. Here in Oxford, they're all done in the hospital... Which is usually the place to avoid!  I had my last one yesterday and everything looks great, praise God! That means I won't be back at the hospital again if all goes to plan because... I'm going to have a homebirth this time! 😍

The midwives here in England actually encourage you to have a homebirth if possible. They see better outcomes for mom and baby and it keeps the hospitals open for those who really need it. I've really enjoyed my midwife and her approach to pregnancy and birth. 

Did you have a homebirth? Leave me any tips in the comments below! 💕🤱
    As mothers, we can trust that God knows all the da As mothers, we can trust that God knows all the days of our children, even if they were only a few days or weeks in our wombs. Praise Him for His faithfulness to us in the difficult times of raising babies! 💕
    So, this current pregnancy is actually my 4th preg So, this current pregnancy is actually my 4th pregnancy. I have one daughter who is 5-years-old and then I had two pregnancies after her that ended in very early miscarriage.

One thing I’ve learned from having miscarriages is this: 

every life, no matter how long, should be known and celebrated. 

I only knew about my two other babies for a few short days before they were gone. Those two little lines on the pregnancy tests told me they were there, but then they were gone before the first ultrasound. 

But as their mama, those little lives are still precious to me. They still lived and they were little persons for those days that they lived. And I know that those lives are precious to God because He created them.

In both of my miscarriage experiences, God showed Himself to be faithful. But in looking back, I now see the need to tell other people early on about pregnancy and I wish I had done that then.

There’s a certain assurance in telling other people you are pregnant that I really needed. Not assurance that the pregnancy is going to go through without a problem. But assurance that your friends, church, and family will be there for you if it doesn’t.

This time around, I did tell people a lot earlier on. No, it wasn’t a big announcement on social media with a cute onesie. But I texted my family and in-laws. And then I also texted the ladies at my church, telling them I had just found out and asking them to pray because I have had miscarriages before. Those messages back from family and friends were nothing special, they mostly said, “Congratulations! We’re praying for you!” But those simple words were profoundly encouraging. They knew about this little life that I had inside and they were part of it with me, for worse or for better. And, I knew that they would be praying alongside me for this pregnancy and baby.
    Yesterday I spent the whole afternoon at a garden Yesterday I spent the whole afternoon at a garden centre. It was chock full of beauty. The plants, the seed packets, the tools, the bird houses… you name it, it was beautiful. 

But as I looked at the beautiful plants, potted with compost and some towering high, I was a bit sad and felt like I was missing out. One of the joys of cultivating a beautiful back garden (or an allotment!) would be to buy a big bush plant and settle it in, enjoying it year after year. For me, as someone who is most likely moving within the next year to who knows where, I won’t get that year-after-year return on the work I’m doing right now in my garden. Though I was feeling sad, I said to myself, "wait a minute!" I have plenty of ways to invest and enjoy in my garden right now without waiting for the year-after-year return. I can sow lettuces or radishes and harvest them within a month. I can plant flower seeds and they'll grow and bloom by July. And, so what if I'm not here year after year to enjoy it? It's still nice while I can be here!

And that little lesson from the garden centre also applies to other areas of my life as I live in places briefly, especially when it comes to friendships. I can sometimes be led to think that it’s not worth the effort to make friends or get to know people when we will be moving on to another place shortly. But that is not true! The investment and work in friendships, even for a short time, is worth it. It is beautiful to get to know new people and love and serve alongside them, or serve them directly. That brings glory to God, even if there’s not a year-after-year return in store for me. And, with an eternal perspective, we will have year after year after year of return on our investments in God's Kingdom. Using our time to love and serve others is never a waste.

1 Corinthians 15:55 says that we should “excel in the work of the Lord, knowing that our labor is not in vain in the Lord.”
    Living abroad has definitely been an adventure! I Living abroad has definitely been an adventure! I had so many ideas of what I thought England would be like before moving here. It's actually pretty beautiful. ❤️ And I can't wait to enjoy the British summer again this year! 😎

Do you like the summertime better than other seasons? ☀️⛱️🌊
    Just in case you need to hear it today: ✨Nothi Just in case you need to hear it today: 

✨Nothing will replace reading the actual Bible to your children. ✨

There are many good children's Bibles and books out there and they can be very helpful. But nothing, absolutely nothing, will take the place of reading the actual Words of Life to your child/children.

We had some silliness during this morning's reading. As I told my daughter that we need to be reverent when reading the Bible she, of course, asked why. And I said, "Because these are God's Words!" What a blessing to read them and know them. 

May they be precious to you today, friends. ❤️

Psalm 119:18 "Open my eyes, that I may behold wonderful things from Your law."
    "There is no death of sin without the death of Chr "There is no death of sin without the death of Christ." -- John Owen

And that, my friends, is why today is called Good Friday, for it is good indeed.
    32 weeks! 🥹 In some ways I can't believe we've 32 weeks! 🥹 In some ways I can't believe we've made it this far and in other ways it's feels like I've been pregnant for a very long time. Each day has its own challenges and worries. Which is why I'm so thankful that Jesus said, "Do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." And to instead: "Seek first His kingdom and His righteousness." Here's to seeking God's kingdom and righteousness in the 8ish weeks I have left!

(Matthew 6:34-35)
    Does God know all things? Yes, God knows all thing Does God know all things? Yes, God knows all things, nothing can be hidden from God. 

This catechism question could fill us with fear... "God knows all about my son!"
But lately it has filled me with hope and comfort. God knows what I experience each and every day. He knows my deepest pain or my brightest joy. He knows my every fleeting feeling from every single moment that I've ever lived. And He holds me under the shadow of His wing. (Psalm 17:8). ❤️
    After reading his commentaries almost daily for th After reading his commentaries almost daily for the last few years, you can see from this picture how happy I was to visit John Calvin's Church in Geneva this week! 😍
    Happy New Year from us! I am definitely looking f Happy New Year from us! 
I am definitely looking forward to what 2023 will hold for our growing fam. ❤️ And striving to look forward to THE new beginning to come. John Calvin said, "No man has made much progress in the school of Christ who does not look forward with joy to the day of death and final resurrection."
    It has been over two years since I laid on a medic It has been over two years since I laid on a medical bed with the ultrasound wand on my stomach to see what was inside. The last two times brought heartbreak as I saw the empty screens confirming the loss of two little babies I only carried for a few weeks each.

But yesterday? That screen was full. 
We're expecting a baby in May 2023.

This pregnancy has already been really different from my first one with my daughter. That is why you haven’t heard from me! I’ve definitely been in survival mode from the nausea and exhaustion. But, of course, I am so thankful for this little one that God has given. I know we often use Job’s famous line when we lose something, but it has been ringing in my head throughout this pregnancy so far:

“The Lord GIVES and the Lord takes away; blessed be the name of the Lord.” Job 1:21
    We've lived as expats in Oxford for almost 2 years We've lived as expats in Oxford for almost 2 years. Coming home from holiday truly felt like coming home. I love Oxford. What a challenging, exciting, and enjoyable chapter of life it is turning out to be. And what a grace from God because I could not have been brave enough to do it without Him. 💗
    Our August thus far. This one is just for the memo Our August thus far.
This one is just for the memories. ❤️
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